Understanding Your Child’s Nervous System:
Why Regulation Comes Before Learning
When we think about childhood development, we often focus on milestones—walking, talking, drawing, writing. But underneath all of these skills is something even more foundational: the nervous system.
At Seeds OT, one of the first things we look at is not just what a child is doing, but how their nervous system is functioning. That’s because the nervous system sets the stage for everything else—movement, emotion, attention, learning, behaviour, and connection.
What Is the Nervous System?
The nervous system is your child’s internal communication network. It includes the brain, spinal cord, and all the nerves in the body. It’s in charge of:
Taking in information from the world (through the senses)
Deciding how to respond (fight, flight, freeze, focus, play, etc.)
Controlling the body (movement, balance, coordination)
Managing internal systems (breathing, heart rate, digestion, temperature)
Supporting emotional responses and social interaction
In short, it’s the system that helps your child feel safe, focused, and connected—or overwhelmed, shut down, or reactive.
Why It Matters in Development
Children’s nervous systems are still developing—especially in the first 7 to 10 years of life. That means:
Their ability to regulate emotions is still growing
They may become overwhelmed by noise, crowds, or sudden changes
Their body awareness and coordination are still catching up
Transitions, waiting, or sharing can feel really hard
They often rely on adults to help them co-regulate before they can self-regulate
When a child’s nervous system is dysregulated—when they’re in fight, flight, or freeze mode—they can't learn, problem-solve, or connect in the way we might expect. That’s why helping them feel safe and grounded needs to come before we focus on behaviour or skills.
Signs of a Dysregulated Nervous System
Every child is different, but some common signs include:
Frequent meltdowns or “big feelings”
Difficulty transitioning between activities
Seeking or avoiding certain sensory input (touch, sound, movement)
Trouble sitting still or paying attention
Avoiding new or challenging tasks
Appearing constantly “on edge,” anxious, or distracted
These behaviours aren’t about being naughty, lazy, or difficult—they’re often signs that the nervous system needs support.
What Regulates the Nervous System?
There are three key pillars that help the nervous system grow and stay regulated:
1. Movement – Physical activity helps build coordination, body awareness, and nervous system strength. Children need lots of movement to feel regulated and ready to learn.
2. Sensory Input – Touch, sound, smell, balance, and body sensations all play a role. Some kids need more sensory input to stay calm and focused; others need less. Knowing what your child needs helps you respond with confidence.
3. Connection – Relationships with safe, attuned adults help the nervous system develop. When a child feels seen and understood, their brain literally wires itself for better regulation and resilience.
How OT Supports the Developing Nervous System
At Seeds OT, we look beneath behaviours to understand what your child’s body and brain are telling us. We use play-based strategies to:
Support sensory integration
Build emotional regulation and body awareness
Improve coordination, balance, and motor planning
Support safe social and communication skills
Strengthen the child’s capacity for calm, focus, and resilience
We also work closely with you—so that you can understand your child’s cues, support their regulation at home, and create routines and environments that feel safe and manageable for them.
It’s Okay If Your Child Isn’t “There Yet”
Development isn’t a race. Some children need more time, more support, or a different approach to thrive. That’s not a failure—it’s a reflection of their unique nervous system.